Bates, you’re killing me, man.
Between the limp-corrector leg brace making him a bloody mess and the “I can’t tell you my secret” conversation with Anna the Housemaid who confesses her love for him, Bates is making me a blubbering fool. Don’t you even think of hurting him, Thomas and O’Brien!
Yes, I just called out two of the characters for being mean to another fictional character. But I don’t trust them. They are sneaky and up to no good.
Anyway, back to Downton Abbey. I just saw Part Two online right before Three so I shall do a DA Mash-up. After Part One, we find that Maggie Smith is still awesome and she is in a battle of wills with Isobel Crawley, the mother to the new heir of DA. Mrs. Crawley is played by Penelope Wilton, AKA Harriet Smith from Doctor Who. First round of Smith v Smith went to Mrs. Crawley when, against Maggie’s protestations, her medical advice saved a man’s life. Round Two saw Maggie victorious when Mrs. Crawley misdiagnosed her butler’s rash as a horrid skin disease and Maggie correctly determined it was an allergic reaction. Tie game. So Round Three had Mrs. Crawley campaigning for her butler’s dad’s roses to win the Best Bloom award. Maggie wins every year. It was brought to her attention that it was out of placation and not merit that she wins. But when Maggie is about to announce Best Bloom and sees that she’s won again, she announces the butler’s dad’s name instead. Edge: Maggie.
Part Two saw the eldest (and bitchy) daughter Mary fling herself at a visiting hunky Turk. Poor Cousin Matthew. He, for some reason, likes to be dissed by Mary so he fancies her. Meanwhile, Mary’s sister Edith is after Cousin Matthew. The Mary v Edith battle is getting nasty.
Now back to the dead Turk. Oops. Got ahead of myself. The Turk sneaks into Mary’s room and seduces her. She had a very “I’m not that kind of girl but, hey, if you don’t tell anyone…” reaction. Conflicted, I would say. And then horrified when she is under the dead weight of the visiting Turk. Stroke apparently. So he won’t be telling anyone. Mary, in a panic, calls on Anna the Housemaid to help with the “cleanup”. Wow: Other Duties As Assigned.
Then everyone goes to a fair!
Well, not immediately.
What did I learn from Downton Abbey Parts Two & Three? Besides that there is a hell of a lot that I’m leaving out because it rocks so much? Carson once was an actor. Gwen the maid wants to be a secretary. Lady Sybil wants to help Gwen be a secretary. And O’Brien gets a verbal slap down from Lady Grantham! You’re next, Thomas. Leave Bates alone!
